Sweet Driving Songs Ep.5: Parliament's "Children Of Production"

Gotta love that afro

Let me ask you guys a question: How are you feeling today? If you're happy, we can make you even happier. Those of you who don't feel Spongebob-like euphoria right now, don't worry! I have the solution: a lil' bit of groove to get yo body movin' from Parliament. The band, that is. Not the room filled with old and loony dudes. This Parliament's goal is to funkatize your life! They want to get your hips dancing. Well, probably not your hips, if you're driving... more like your upper body. Anyways, the song talks about the "Children of Production", Dr. Funkestein's clones, created by him to funk the Earth up. In other words, to control the world with funky sounds like this. I've just come to realize, that Dr. Funkestein's idea is pretty sweet! Just imagine a world where everybody wears sunglasses with stars on them, colourful, eye-popping outfits, dancing around to this music. All hail to the funk! Take me away Dr. Funkestein!

Bimmer Guy Milestone: A Ride In The Best Sounding M3

A few weeks ago, I arrived in my native city, Thessaloniki, which is located in Greece. We're all aware that this is a car blog, not a travel agency, but Greece is easily one of the best, if not the best country for vacation in the whole wide world. Would you like a trip to the beach, to swim in turquoise waters and eat freshly caught  fish everyday? How about a roadtrip to the mountains, where you can simply enjoy the peace and quiet, go hiking to pick oregano and drink water straight from the mountain? Greece has it all.

Anyways, on the first day of my arrival, I started to walk to the bus stop for a nice afternoon walk in the center of town. In the first 100 meters of my journey, I looked towards our neighbour's house to see if his 6,7 lt Dodge Ram Cummins was in the driveway. However, instead of the truck was an BMW E46 M3, lowered, with Hartge looking three piece rims, a midnight blue paint job and a fat-ass exhaust! I said "Hi" to the owner, Makis, expressed my admiration for that beauty and took a few pics. In return, Makis offered me a ride in his Bimmer, the M3. I couldn't believe it!

One grueling week of waiting later, on a late Monday afternoon, Makis stopped by to pick me up for a spin. Right from the get-go, the '46 was loud. In low speeds, like most BMs with loud exhausts, it was a bit drony, but that wasn't a problem. In the first '90 degree turn, Makis just eased into the gas, and the car was already sideways.  Greek roads are so old and shitty, that almost any car has a hard time gripping the road. Keep that in mind as you read this short story; it'll facilitate your understanding.

The first thing I asked Makis was how much he paid for his exhaust. We're talking about a fast 3-series here, not a Lambo. Any price you guess will not scratch the surface of the number I'm about to splurt out. For a "Loud as fuck, boyyyy!" exhaust system like the one on this M3, you need 11,000 Euros. Yes, with three zeros. What, you may ask, makes this exhaust setup so expensive? Titatium, the rare, super light but fragile metal from the headers all the way to the back, topped off with a Supersprint muffler. Makis wanted to put the headers on display in his living room. They're that beautiful... and they make the car sound as if one million bees are buzzing behind it. Makis bought this car new, when he was living in the US, because of his love for BMWs. Like any right minded Bimmer-guy, Makis bought, in 2002, a Carbonschwarz Metallic E46 M3, with a black cloth-leather interior, old carbon as aftermarket trim and an SMG gearbox. Before the SMG loathers start to moan, Makis bought it for an understandable reason: he liked the kick that you get after every gear change. After we exited the small town that is between our houses and the twisties, we lowered the windows and got ready for the action.

Right on the start of the road, a dumb-ass Toyota Corolla was blocking our path. So Makis did what any guy with a 360 hp M3 and cold tires would do: floored it and passed the Corolla while sideways.  Then came the real fun. The uphill was empty, and I left Makis concentrate on his driving while I subdued myself to the M3's screaming. Makis drifted around every single corner, spinning the tires down the straights. This baby will leave you stupefied when you'll hear it nearing its stratospherical, for any car, redline.  I thought to myself that an E46 M3 is the answer to all my problems. I would never, ever be sad when I'd drive it. You simply giggle your ass of. The M3, with its HR coilovers, Brembo 4 piston brakes front and rear, and drilled discs, cornered as flat as a pancake. Combine that
with wide Japanese, three-piece Radenergie rims and you have a perfectly balanced sports car.


As we cruised back home, we stopped to take a few pictures in front of the house, check out the S54 and rev it up enough times to start a new dawn of the dead. Finally, Makis left with a nicely executed burnout for the 100 meters he had  to drive to his house. I was so happy, I hopped and giggled like Pipi Longstocking on my way to my house. The first person I called was, of course, my buddy, Vadim, who, hearing my uncontrollable laughter, asked: "You went for a drive in the M3, didn't you?".


 The E46 M3 is worth all the hype it has received over the years. Even though I adore the E30 M3, it's design is unmistakably 80's. Yet, the E46's curves are timeless and they define it, in my eyes, as the most beautiful M3 ever built. BMW didn't stop there and slammed a 3,2lt 6-cylinder that revs to 8,200 rpm... in a 3-series, lets not forget.  Even after 15 years of ownership, Makis wants to keep the M3 indefinitely. When he has an unpleasant day, he hops in the M3, fires it up and goes redlining around the mountains to calm himself. "Refreshment is 100% guaranteed" is a slogan BMW should've used in one its ads back in the early noughties. Whatever revs to the sky, sounds like a racecar and makes you happy, is worth keeping forever.

Thank you Makis, for taking me for drive in one of my favorite cars of all time, the E46 M3, which happened to be my first ever ride in an M3. So, like most first-times, it will stay an unforgettable experience.

Does she really need explaining?

Big Block Mania: Who Cares About Polar Bears And MPG Anyway

A few weeks ago, I had a surgery on my brain. The surgery lasted 15 minutes and will be an experience that I'll always remember. The doctor was Junior, a car meet acquaintance. The tool? A '69/'70 Chevrolet Chevelle SS396 with a Muncie 4-speed. The problem with my brain, and myself, was that I hadn't yet experienced a big-block muscle car, let alone with a 4-speed, all wrapped up in one of the most desired and bad-ass American cars ever produced. Now I'm cured... and I'm hooked on big blocks.

Guys, we need a time machine.

It was a Friday night and I was cycling to my friend Vadim's house. The air was warm and humid. The roads were calm and the cars on the road were few. But, out of nowhere, a rumbling noise broke the night's silence. If you live in Belgium, you stop getting excited when you hear a V8-like noise because it always ends up being a freakin' Harley. It's not that V-twins don't sound satisfying or cool, but if I was to have my hearing decimated, a V8 is the weapon of choice. Anyways, in a spartanly lit road in Belgium, a red Chevelle with two fat black stripes spread from hood to trunk passed by at full chat. The driver let of the throttle and the unburnt fuel caused a few crackles and pops while the beast took a breath. No wonder it was hard to cycle the journey's final moments: my jaw had been dragging on the asphalt since the Chevelle's fly-by.

A few minutes later, while waiting for Vadim to open the door, a bassy rumble appeared in my hearing field. Obviously, anything sounding different that your typical diesel/gasoline four cylinder is worth checking out. Unsurprisingly, the culprit of all this ruckus was the Chevelle I had seen 10 minutes ago, only then to find Vadim and Junior, the car's owner, getting out of it.

Big Block VS Small Block

The first thing you notice on the Chevelle is its stance. The most accurate term to describe the car's look is "bad-ass". The feeling you get when you feast your eyes on the Chevy's simple and quintessentially 60's muscle car design is similar to the one you get when looking at Ice Cube: even if he's friendly and cool with you, he always looks angry. You sense a pleasant intimidation. In my opinion, only a handful of cars have this charm, like the Mercedes G63 6x6, vintage muscle cars or pre-war luxury cars. But the Chevelle's styling would've seemed faulted if it wasn't equipped with the legendary Magnum 500 wheels. The rear-ones are probably the coolest ones to observe, since they're 1-2" wider that the fronts and have a polished lip the size of probably two Lego figures. These Mags improve the car's styling by landslide. After having seen a 350 Chevelle with factory Cragars that made it resemble a boat on four wheels, Junior's one was similar to a large Rottweiler, ready to attack. Passing in front of the passenger window, I snooped inside to recognise a beautiful, all-metal Hurst shifter, bucket seats and a black vinyl interior. Then, I noticed the "SS396" emblems, meaning that it had a 396 c.i. V8 big-block with 376 hp at top spec. However, Junior told me it didn't have a 396, but a 454 c.i., also a big-block. In case you're not into inches, 454 c.i. equates to 7,500 cc. What a monster of an engine! The 454 was one of the baddest, most powerful engines ever put inside a muscle car, towards the end of the muscle car wars of the 60's. When new, the Chevelle supposedly made around 450 hp, which is considered kinda conservative. The SS454s probably made closer to 500 hp. You may wonder what is the price for all this goodness. Guess....WRONG! Junior paid 12k Euros for this incredible Chevelle, the same price as a new, base model 1,2 lt Renault Clio with a whopping 75 hp. Pretty hard to choose between the two, innit?!

The Mags are the real deal.

After a few hours of chilling and car talk, it was time to go home: Junior in his 7,5 lt muscle car and me on the mountain bike. One of the least ecological and coolest cars of all time versus the least polluting means of transport, a bicycle. Bizarrely and thankfully, my luck turned to my favour that night because Junior offered to take me home in the Chevelle. So much win and we had yet to put the bike in the trunk.

True dat!

The time was about 2 a.m.. The Chevy looked even meaner than it did before. The yellowy street lights, combined with the sky's darkness and the mist on the car's body would've been a great photo. Unfortunately, the Samsung S5's camera wouldn't have done the car justice; its camera is crap at night.  Five grueling minutes later, the bike had been wrestled in the Chevelle's enormous, insulation-less trunk... just. The trunk couldn't close unless we dented it. We said "Fuck it! We'll leave it like this" and got in the car.

The Chevelle is an enormous car for European standards. It is a coupe with an enormous V8, space for five adults, even six, if you have one with bench seats, and enough space in the trunk for about two, maybe three dead bodies; or probably 10 bags filled with pineapples; or a mountain bike. The seats are heavily sprung and comfortable, and the interior is airy and very roomy. The accessories are pretty sparse, since we're talking about a car from the late 60's. But you don't really need much in a car like this.

The big daddy of V8s.

We buckled-up and Junior fired-up the beast. The sound of the 454's lumpy idle, mixed with the smell of super unleaded and the jiggling of the car's body, caused by the stonking motor, are part of the muscle car experience. Even at 30-40 kph in suburban Brussels, you can feel the big-block's 700 N-m of torque. The power delivery was simply effortless, like a body-builder lifting half a dozen 1,5lt water bottles. As we progressed to the main road, the Chevelle started to show its cruising potential. The ride is wafty and bouncy but perfect for relaxation.

Which brings me to the other facia of the Chevelle's bipolarism: it's made for hooning. Arriving at the red light before the 2/2,5 km radar-less straight, I said to Junior to show me the Chevy's potential. He smirked and, when the light turned green, he gave it the beans. Accompanied by the Hurst shifter's click-clack, the 454 sounded brutal and kinda like a machine-gun/velociraptor. In every gear change, the big-block oozed-out more and more torque. You feel as if the car can tow a Hummer without breaking a sweat. A Chevelle with a big-block and a 4-speed turns all your senses up to 11 and you start to giggle like Cheech and Chong. You can even feel the posi-traction (Chevy's LSD) working, something I've never felt in any other car. You notice the diff doing its job, constantly varying the speed of each rear wheel. I was in heaven; I finally understood why there's so much hype surrounding the 454 Chevelles... and I loved every single second of that drive.

You have to see it to believe it.

Succeeding our arrival, Junior showed me the big block, which was, obviously, pretty big. It was quite a lump of engine and I hadn't ever seen one its size in a car. As impressive as all that was, Junior had to leave, so we exchanged fist bumps and off he went. Nevertheless, he went around the 600 m long cul de sac that is right after my house, so he could go back up the straightaway perpendicular to the main road. I waited for the Chevelle to go down the straight, hopefully at full chat. Again, the car gods were on my side that day. As Junior reappeared, he went from warm-up mode to full bonanza mode, flooring-it till the end of the road. Of course, I could not contain my enthusiasm and started to giggle like a mofo... again. I would be very surprised if none of my neighbours woke up to a Chevelle 454 at full song.

The most accurate word to describe the Chevelle 454 is "sensational". It is so sensational that when I had to study in the weekend for the fuckloads of tests assigned by my irking school, I was only thinking about how incredible the big-block experience was. Cars like this leave you in an awe that you can't forget. You end-up wanting more and more. The only way to solve this problem? Buy one! You don't even have to buy a Chevelle. Plenty of vintage American cars came with big-blocks. If anyone ever offers you to go for ride in a big-block car, especially one like the Chevelle, just do it. You'll feel like you've never felt before in an automobile. It wakes you up and fills you with adrenaline and excitement. It's gas-guzzling America at its finest.

Sweet Driving Songs Ep.4: The Allman Brothers Band "Jessica"

Moustache time!

This is a real treat for you guys because it's the soundtrack of one of your favorite car shows. Seriously, if you don't recognise it from the first 15 seconds, well, you probably haven't had any access to neither the internet nor the TV for quite some time. Don't fret though, 'cause if you don't know this song's value to the car world, you'll appreciate it for the phenomenal tune that it is.  While listening to "Jessica", keep one thing in mind: there are two lead guitarists, one bassist, one pianist and, not one, but two drummers! How often do you hear of a band like this in rock n' roll, let alone any music genre?! Not very often, that's for sure. The sound is classic 70's rock, with a pleasant balance between all the instruments, one's presence not being superior to the other's. The accent of Gregg Allman (singer, lead guitarist and one of the founders) is unsurprisingly southern, since he comes from Nashville, Tennessee, and not rednecky at all, which is a plus. What I like the most about the Allan Brothers are their solos and instrumental songs, such as "Jessica". You can really see the pedigree and skillfulness of all the band members. Albums like "Eat a peach", "Brothers and Sisters", "At Fillmore East", etc are the reason that music junkies like me end up spending a hefty amount of their money on records. Oh, and one last thing: please listen to the whole song. Your time will not be wasted.

Sweet Driving Songs Ep.3: Thelonious Monk's "Nutty"

Monk in deep concentration.

My fellow bloggies, you better start getting used to seeing posts of jazz on Sweet Driving Songs cause I'll rape (in a good way) your eardrums worse than John Wayne Gacy did to teenage boys... before killing them. Okay, okay it may seem as an extreme comparison to you, but with so many marvelous jazz tunes to listen to and discover, let's say that you will have enough to create a playlist worthy of a trip around the world; by car, of course. Thelonious Monk, in case you don't know, is considered one of the best jazz pianists to have even set foot upon our beautiful planet Earth. At the beginning of his career, Monk wasn't well perceived, especially when he played in France, because of his purist-upsetting style. He was different and ballsy at the same time, for going against the general public's fear of the unknown and sticking to his guns, as we say. The way Monk has you hooked on a major chord progression and then, out of nowhere, falls to a minor is typical of his way of composing. His style is chaotic but controlled at the same time. Think of it as the rallying of music. In rallying, you have to settle for spontaneous decisions, resulting in you making up ground as if you've eaten the worst Indian meal of your life and, at the same time, tickling the balls of physics by pushing your ride to the limit. Thelonious does the same thing with his piano, producing a melody that could've easily sounded off but ends up exceptional. If that isn't mastery, then I'll ride bicycles for the rest of my life and shout at people who do burnouts. Check out Thelonious Monk's Trio awesomeness here!  

Sweet Driving Songs Ep.2: Cypress Hill's "When The Shit Goes Down"

A few years back, I didn't listen at all to Cypress Hill. It was probably B-Real's annoying voice that kept me disinterested. Bare with me for a sec, though. After scrutinizing DJ Muggs' funky-ass beats, overflowing with booming bass, crazy sound effects and mint sampling, you have to plainly appreciate his mastery. Hell, he's even sampled Jimi Hendrix's "Are you experienced" in the legendary song "How I could just kill a man"! The next step is falling in love B-Real's brat-like voice. The way he fades away at the end of verses, being like "Homeboyyy" or "Throw your set in the aiiiiir" is just addicting. Add to that the flowing and sometimes ecstatically violent rhymes, combined with his SoCal latino accent and you get quality music to bounce to. Now I can't stop listening to Cypress Hill and their songs never get boring. Lend me your ears!  

Wooden Bike: The Future Of Hipster Transportation

Wooden steering wheel

Thessaloniki seafront

Wooden seat!

Gears

When we thought up of our first review of a certain vehicle, we thought that, as a car blog, we should review cars... obviously, A review of any car, even a Hyundai Getz, I dare say. But, there are a few obstacles. I haven't got my driver's licence yet and I've only driven two times. Sooo, since it's a beautiful, sunny day in the city of Thessaloniki (Greece), I've decided to rent a bike, cycle by the sea and search for some barn finds. To my surprise, along with all the normal bikes, there were city bikes made out of wood. No joke! For 3,5 Euros/hour, I said "Fuck it!" and got the wooden bike.  It is stunning to look at. The best part of the design, in my opinion, is the seat, because of its complex curves. And of I went to search for some barn finds and review this bike. The steering wheel is wobbly and requires your hands to be placed at the edges of the handles, for a smooth steering feel. The gear are integrated in the hub of the rim, what could be best described as a 2-speed automatic tranny. You brake in the rear by counter-pedalling. The front brake is squishy but smooth even for "performance cycling". In the wet, the wooden handles would probably make your hands slip around. But in the dry, the handles don't bruise your hands from extensive use like the rubber ones do. Since the roads in Greece are worse than those in " Mad Max", I got to feel the lack of suspension travel... cause the suspension is made out of wood. The wooden seat turned my private parts into Marmite. The small bumps found in the asphalt and the sidewalk don't upset the bike's ride quality.

E30 and old Opel

After 15 minutes, I took a small detour to test the bike's off-road capabilities. There's was a very thin trail, on a mini-hill. A guy on a mountain bike didn't manage to go up trail and walked it off. I breathed-out and pedalled like a mofo to go up the hill, just to get enough momentum for the descent. The Coco-Mat bike OWNED IT because of its enormous rims and tires, Impressive!

E30 and skoda in the back

Shortly after, I arrived at the lot with the cars. There was a blackish E30 sedan with an M-Tec wing and, presumably, BBS replicas. A white E30 with real BBS rims was hiding in the back next to a Skoda, In the front, there was an old Opel from the 60's, I think. No way to get in from the front cause the door was locked to the fence. I went to the left side of the property ,and an old man, who works in an old-ass mini-golf course next to the lot, wanted to know about the bike. Post-explication he let me take pictures of an effed-up Jeep. Filled on the inside with random shit, wood placed on the bonnet, inaccessible driver's door, knackered grill and collapsed axles rotting to the ground. To the remember this cool adventure, the old-man let met wrestle out the Jeep's old Thessaloniki licence plate. I'm guessing the Jeep was either a CJ2 or a CJ3A, but for obvious reasons, it's hard to tell.

With new blog material in hand, I finished of the day with ride to the park, on the hill, by the sea, There was still plenty of sunlight left. So I put on some Thelonious Monk and chilled by the sea. As for the bike, it got loads of attention by passers-by. I briefed three different groups of people on the bike's construction and drivability (ridability?). A couple who was taking pictures at the park, took a few more on the bike! The Coco-Mat wooden bike could be best described as a Bmw i3 with Delorean levels of coolness. And yes, it the ultimate hipster bike.    

Effed-up Jeep

Sweet Driving Songs Ep.1: Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir"

I wonder who's Flavo Flav.

Boys and gals, I present to you our blog's new segment, called: "Sweet Driving Songs". The reason for its creation is quite simple, really . I'm tired of listening to crappy, dull, simplistic, soulless songs playing in the buses, the bars, the clubs, the parties,... The list goes on and on! I know some of you love to max out your car's sound system, and I do too. It's the best way to enjoy and analyse the songs we're listening to. BUT, repetitive pop music and all that techno, trap, dubstep crap is more sound polluting that the straight-piped 1,2L diesel Polo you're driving. Now, some of you may be reminded of the songs and the memories that go with them. And the rest of you may discover some cool new tunes to add on your playlists. Good music and nice cars go hand in hand like Flavor Flav and chains with full sized clocks on them. Without further ado, crank up the volume to Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir". Robert Plant and Jimmy Page were inspired to make this epic song while driving through the Sahara Desert. Check it out here!

 

Sorting Out Nuts: The Way To Meditate

In the 21st century, the world is more stressed than ever. Plenty of companies' stockholders are treating employees like a pimp treats his hoes, pressuring them to work harder for a heftier profit in the old farts' pockets. How do you think they pay for their viagra-infested orgies? What about the media? It is rendering us unconsciously paranoid, with us looking out for terrorists and other wacky people in the subway. But even simpler things, such as trying to start a conversation with our crush, can have us shaking more than a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man. What do we do?

No, not these nutz!

There are many ways we deal with stress. Some go down the spiritual route by meditating. practicing zen Buddhism or even staring at the vastness of the sky and philosophizing. Others choose to smoke a little bit of chronic (a.k.a. Dr. Dre, Snoop Doggy Dogg, Ice Cube, you get my flow), work out, go for massages, etc. There are a few problems if you're a car enthusiast, though. For a start, meditation takes time to learn. So instead of searching for wallet annihilating project cars on craigslist, you'll be teaching yourself how to breathe in and out like Confucius. Also, smoking cheeba-cheeba doesn't mix very well with driving. And why go to the gym when you can lift your spare wheel or muffler? Plus, sensual massages or RC car building can end up using a decent chunk of your budget in the long term. The solution: sorting out nuts.

Now that's more like it

Well, by nuts, I mean bolts. You know, the ones lying around your garage the same way LEGOs are in an 8-year old's room. Simply, give each thread type its designated box. Now, assemble all the random bolts in another box. Proceed by taking one bolt at a time, trying to make the thread click with one of the separated bolts, and, when it clicks, put the bastard in the right box. You have to be concentrated on your task to prevent screw-ups. It automatically makes you forget all of your problems and relax. As they say in the movie "Anchorman": "60% of the time, it works, every time". Just kidding; it always works.

So what is the moral of today's story? If you wanna be zen and clean up your garage, sort out nuts.



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A Love Letter To The E30

One of my favourite jazzmen

    Jazz is everywhere. You could find it in a store, a cocktail party or even an elevator. Like an all-you-can-fit sock, it's suitable for everybody's lifestyle. It could play a direct or indirect role in our lives. However, the majority of people don't seem to notice the hidden beauty of jazz. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems as if this extraordinary music genre is more often perceived as background music rather than the ensemble of virtuosity that it represents.  Jazz requires just little bit of your time, where all you do is listen to the melody and try to break it down into small, easily digestible pieces. Being stuck on first impressions and prejudices prevents you from discovering its uniqueness , hidden from plain sight... just like the E30.

    

 

Simple and direct

The second generation of BMW's infamous 3 series, codenamed E30, was nothing short of a landmark for the company. For a start, the car came in 5 different body styles (Coupe, Touring (station-wagon), Sedan, Cabriolet and Baur (cabriolet/targa)) whereas all the other series had been getting 2 at most . The wagon (Touring) body was a company first; up until then, sedans, coupes and cabrios had been the only choices. Also, in 1985, the first iteration of x-drive made its appearance in the 325ix. Even if the rear-biased all-wheel-drive system is complex and rudimentary by today's standards, in the mid-80's, it was a novel system no less. Torque vectoring was what differentiated the 325ix from it's few competitors, as it was capable of sending from 10% to 100% of the power available to just one axle. If it was slipping, that is. With the abundant  use of aluminium in various places of the mechanism, the ix weighed in only 80 kg more than the rear-wheel drive version, quite impressive for such a heavy duty design. To top it off, the 325ix received fender flares, extra ground clearance and even more street-cred! Without further ado, lets find out what makes this 80's luxury sedan so special.

Versatility

A 325ix in its natural habitat

As I mentioned previously, the E30 can be adapted to anyone's lifestyle. The engine displacement varies from a 1,6L four pot to a 3,2L six-pot (exclusive to the South African market), some single cam and others twin cam. Unfortunately, you only had one choice if you wanted a diesel, the 324td; and x-drive could only be mated to the 2,5L M20 motor, which shouldn't be considered as an inconvenience. The M20 is an exceptional power plant, combining bulletproof reliability with decent power and torque. It shows to BM haters that the company didn't always build ticking time tombs as engines. But wait, there's more. The 5 body styles were enough to please anyone's tastes. Tourings were perfect as family cars, emergency and delivery vehicles. Coupes and Baurs were more appealing to the dudes, whereas Cabrios were mostly for the gals (because of them lacking the structural rigidity of a hard top, they were better suited for cruising; not performance driving). Of course, we shouldn't forget the M3, one of the winningest race cars of all time and the Holy Grail of M cars. If you wanted to build race car of any sort, this was the car for you. Though, because of this cult-like following, the M3 has ended up becoming another overhyped automobile, such as 440 Dodges and every air-cooled Porsche ever!

Reliability

M20B25 in its' full glory

Yes, I know it's as hard to believe as Bigfoot's existence but, in the not so distant past, BMW built reliable cars. In fact, most of 80's bimmers were so reliable that, today, buying a low mileage 325i, for example, is as pointless as buying a low mileage Supra!  The E30's maintenance mostly consists of the basics, such as spark plugs, fluid top-ups, fuel/air filter changes and the like. That is without taking into account the occasional repairs like belt and bearing replacements, the 24,000km valve adjustment for the M20 engines, etc.  The only two things that weren't thought out as well as the mechanical components were the car's electrics and it's body being notorious to rust. Top tip: if someone is selling a rust-free E30, it was either garaged all its life or the person is lying; finding one is like searching for truffles with no pig.

Driving Experience

Right off the bat, I'd like make a confession: I haven't ever driven an E30, the reason being my lack of driver's licence. It's matter of fact, I've only ever driven one car in my life, and that was Peugeot 2008. I am aware that it's exactly the opposite what someone would call an interesting car by any standards. But it was A car nonetheless. To understand E30's driving experience, I had to ask my buddy Vadim, who has owned a carbed 316, and currently drives a 325i and a 320is.

Alpina E30 = Excellent investment

To begin with, the engine is linear, flexible and durable. If you were to look at the dyno sheet of ANY E30, you'd see a slightly curved, consistent line. Even in the twin-cam models, such as the M3 or the 318is, it would be impossible to notice the car "climbing onto the cam", as they say. Just to give you another perspective, the way all E30s deliver their power is directly opposed to VTEC equipped Hondas, the latter being pretty gutless before 5k RPM, taking off after said mark. The silky smooth powerband, being a bimmer character trait, permits precise and predictable power inputs, which explains why they're so popular in rallying, track driving, drifting, etc. Oh, and you can rev out any engine, even the 1.6, and the car won't see it as a punishment. To the contrary, it'll ask for more!

As for the handling, Vadim described the E30 being as connected as an octopus because you discern the engineering dumped into its' design with the goal it being a solid automobile, not all wobbly like a Golf or a Mercedes of the time. It really feels as if the ensemble of the car's components are perfectly balanced, resulting to a harmonious driving experience. Two factors render this possible: an (almost) perfect weight distribution (52/48) and a curb weight in the region of 1,200/1,300 kg. A well known guy in the auto industry once said "Adding power makes you faster in the straights. Subtracting weight makes you faster everywhere". The man in question was called Colin Chapman.


Do you wanna know what's the icing on the cake? The sound! Like all animals, humans are attracted to certain sounds or melodies like a hummingbird's singing, Morgan Freeman's voice, a woman's melodic orgasm and, even better... a 325i at full chat! Yeah, yeah, there's was also the M3 but, in my opinion, it'll never sound as good as a 325i 'cause it's a four cylinder. The M20B25 engine, with a performance exhaust, intake and headers produces raspy, metallic, sometimes drony melody similar to that of race car. It sounds that raw! Still not convinced? Check out this video and try not to jizz all over your PC/ smartphone/ tablet/ S-Class/ whatever device that uses the internet:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h__XapY63Fw&t=9s


The Fizz

One thing is for sure: when a car makes you fizz, it's the one for you. The E30, in any guise, will make you fizz. You know what I mean! Like the time you heard this super duper awesome song and you felt a pleasurable stinging, driving around in an E30, a car filled with character, retroness and pizazz, will make you feel the same way. When I see Vadim going down the straight towards my house in his 325i, I start to snicker like a little girl! The distinctive purr of a BMW 6 cylinder penetrates my skin, producing this so-called fizz.  It doesn't end there though. It doesn't matter if you're driving or being driven, this 80's premium sedan offers a beautiful ambience. The airiness of the cabin, the surefooted chassis, the sound of the engine and the linearity of the power delivery are combined all together to create a mesmerizing experience. And that's why the E30 is such a special automobile.

Elfin Beauties: 1987 Buick GNX

   

What is the one thing everybody in the world mad about? Family? Money? Fame? Moussaka? Nope. It's Hot Wheels. Just think about it. You can give it to anybody and they'll start making cartoon-like sound effects, such as "Vroom", Whoosh" and "Thumpata-Thumpata", while drifting on the surface in question. Like connecting two Lego bricks or taking a sip of cold lemonade under the blazing sun, it calms you down. Playing with Hot Wheels forces you to focus on the little car's details and movements that you refrain from worrying about your problems. A useful tool for meditation then, but also as decoration. Let's see if the HW Buick GNX from Fast and Furious 4 is a model worth having.

Story Time  

    The "Grand National" name first appeared in 1982 on a special edition Buick Regal as a NASCAR "homologation special". Most of them came with a 123hp 4.1 litre V6, except for 50 cars that were specced with a 176hp 3.8 litre turbo V6, which could be considered a predecessor to the real Grand National we know and love. However, the real "Dark Side", as it was nicknamed, started production as an appearance package for the Regal T-Type in 1984. What you got was a 200hp and 407 Nm turbocharged 3.8 litre V6 coupled to a smooth 4 speed auto, black paint, a grey and black interior and the turbo 6 emblem splattered here and there. In its last year of production, the now intercooled Darth Vader was producing 245hp and 481Nm. The one we're featuring here, though, is the cream of the crop, creme de la 
creme of Grand Nationals: the GNX. Only 500 were made, which means that for the average Joe, today, paying six digits for a fast Regal is 1) not feasible and 2) plain silly... but that's a story for another day. The power was upped to 300hp and 569Nm with the help of Mclaren, and yes, I'm talking about the same company who later employed Ayrton Senna and who made the coolest, supercariest supercar of all time, the F1. The maximum boost-by-gear went from 15 psi to 16 psi in 1st and 2nd gears, from 10 psi to 14 psi in 3rd and 4th was left untouched at 10 psi. The Brits even changed the size and shape of the fins in the intercooler for improved performance and coolness. If this fact isn't geeky, then Bush would've been mistaken for a Care Bear. 

So? What About The Car?

    One evident trait of today's Hot Wheels is their build quality compared to the older ones. There was time when Hot Wheels had actual suspension travel and the car's undercarriage wasn't plastic, but die-cast metal. Anyhow, that's not awfully crucial since Mattel doesn't give damn about the consumer cause they already have a cult-like following and, unfortunately, having the dignity to offer a well-made product is not even one of our society's top 10 priorities. Nevertheless, I paid 2 bucks for this bad boy and,  to my surprise; it ended up being a fine purchase. It goes totally straight with no sweat. So much so it should be a recruit for the Westboro Baptist Church rallies. The color replicates the life-sized one's gloss though not its depth. Also, the wheel type and color (no surprise there... it's black) go hand in hand with the car's "Dark Side" nickname. Nevertheless, the icing on the cake is the Grand National's logo where you can clearly see the turbo/6 with its distinct red and yellow arrow. And that, in itself, makes the Fast and Furious 4 Buick GNX a Hot Wheels model worth owning.

Note: Big Thanks to Regular Car Reviews for introducing me to this magical automobile! I highly recommend you watch their review and even the walkaround video. Trust me, it's worth it.

Review: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6u8xlg-q5Xc

Walkaround: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yr3_0_sm71k